When it comes to parenting, the tools you choose to implement can mean the difference between a melt-down and a successful parenting moment. Rewards that work are key…as you’ll see in the example below: I could see his little body getting rigid and his eyes were dropping. A stand-off was imminent, and I had no
Choosing parenting rewards that work Read More »
I try not to bring up the trauma of the Jump Park Fiasco of 2019, but I learned some pretty great lessons about what happens when you think you have a great reward to encourage behavior, but it ends up not working AT ALL, so I am willing to share my trauma in hopes that
Parenting tip: what to do When rewards stop working Read More »
When should you give in to your kids? Ever? Never? Here’s the scenario: It’s five minutes past the drop-dead moment for getting in the car and getting everyone to the right place at the right time. I’m running on fumes fueled by the insanity of needing to bring a show-and-tell item that starts with the
the one thing you should absolutely always give into as a parent Read More »
Children respond to rewards…at least typically-developing children do. What about autism and rewards? Can they work in tandem? Rewards are a form of reinforcement, and reinforcement happens on a continuum. You have primary reinforcers on one of the spectrum and secondary reinforcers on the other end of the spectrum. Primary reinforcers are the things that
Autism and rewards: teaching your child with autism to understand typical rewards Read More »
“People are looking at you.” I said this in a hushed tone and without even the hint of judgment, but in the hope of recognition. My son, in his interest in keeping things predictable and exactly the same as before, had escalated at the large family gathering. The result was behavior that was not at
the one thing you need to know about autism Read More »
Nobody likes bribery. We don’t like it in our government and we don’t like it in our parenting. Bribing your kids feels icky to think about. We just want our kids to behave out of the goodness of their hearts, right? Shouldn’t they simply WANT to behave? (Excuse me while I laugh hysterically.) I think
why bribing your kids won’t work: the difference between bribery and reinforcement Read More »
My shy child won’t talk to people when they talk to her and she runs to her room when we have guests. It’s embarrassing sometimes, but mostly I wonder if I should be worried? Shy people get a bad rap. We attach words like ‘withdrawn’ or ‘sullen’ to anyone who isn’t talkative and naturally friendly,
Ask the expert: Help! my four-year-old is so shy! Read More »
At eighteen months, I laid out a set of flannel planets across the living room in hopes of engaging my son. He was constantly in motion, rarely stopped to interact with his parents, and just seemed uninterested in what was going on around him. Still, he was very verbal. Extremely so, as well as highly
Early signs of autism that are easy to miss Read More »
What you probably already know: depression and social isolation–due to COVID precautions or otherwise–don’t mix well. But what is the depression loop and how is it affected by social isolation? Picture this: iIt’s 8 pm on a Saturday night, and my teen is ignoring his phone. Weird, right? Maybe even bizarre behavior from a 16-year-old?
What you need to know about depression and social isolation Read More »
Punishment is such a dirty word. I feel dirty about it. It’s negative and icky and sinks like a sick pit in my stomach when I think about it. And when I have used it with my children, it has worked in the moment, but has long term consequences. In behavioral terms, though, punishment is
changing the way you think about punishment Read More »